I’m hiding in my room with the door closed.
My family is invaluable, enthusiastic, entertaining, loving, caring, and beautiful; but today, I just want them to go away.
Even in the midst of (covid) isolation, I just want to be alone.
Why do I Feel Wrecked?
The problem isn’t my family. And after only one week of isolation, it’s not loneliness, either.
It’s the upheaval of everything normal. It’s the strain of:
- calming the children’s fears and disappointments,
- anticipating the effects of possible unemployment,
- maintaining a cheerful countenance while grocery shopping inside a crazed supermarket,
- organizing three curricula due to mandatory homeschooling,
- staying positive in the face of uncertainty,
I feel guilty for wanting to run away because I have:
- a warm home,
- a loving family,
- food to eat,
- a car to drive,
- supportive neighbors, and
- caring friends.
Desperate for Refreshing
Lord, I’m desperate for refreshing.
I haven’t had time to write (except for right now), and I haven’t been coming to you with my worries and struggles.
Help me. I want to be loving, patient, and kind with my family; but I also just want to be left alone for a few hours.
I know praying will help me, but I don’t feel like praying.
I know your Word will encourage me, but I don’t feel like reading it.
What will you do with this weary child who knows the way to refreshment, but can’t force one foot to step in front of the other to find it?
Father, I need you.
Jesus, I need you.
Holy Spirit, I need you.
Shit. They found me.
Can you relate? Then, you may also relate to: Being Emotional is NOT Being Weak.