Several weeks ago, I longed for connection. Not with people but with God.
I couldn’t find Him. I couldn’t feel him, hear him, or sense him.
Searching for Connection
Well meaning people touted advice on how to find spiritual connection during these trying times:
- Read the Word.
- Make a gratitude journal.
- Show kindness to others.
- Pray.
- Listen to worship songs.
- Join a live-stream church session.
Yet, every suggestion failed me.

My Last Hope
So, I waited for spring. Not to garden but to sit.
Sitting on my patio is my haven, my safe place. I hoped to return to this sanctuary, this fail-safe where I’ve always been able to find God.
Finally, spring arrived, and I took my first patio nap. It was still cool out, but I was desperate. Wearing a thick grey sweater and wrapped in plush blankets, I snuggled into the patio couch. I hauled my laptop outside and opened Spotify to play my favourite worship music playlist.
Yes! Nature and worship, at once? This is the ticket! Today, I will connect.
But it wasn’t, and I didn’t.
The worship annoyed me, grated on my nerves – the ones that craved rest and connection, not noise. I turned off the music, feeling guilty.
Where are you, God? my heart cried. And why don’t I want to worship you?
Connection in the Quiet
I lay back and closed my eyes. I breathed in and out. And there, in the quiet, I found the spiritual connection I was seeking:
- I felt his kindness in the warmth of the sun.
- I felt his joy in the sounds of my children playing.
- Even in the shade of clouds passing overhead, I felt his protection and grace.
Then,
The birds chirped their songs, and my heart leapt.
The trees clap their branches, and my heart joined.
The bunny scurried and nibbled his praise, and my heart giggled.
These, this, they are my worship. God is everywhere, and He’s enough.
God brought the worship team to my backyard. His worship team, His way. I’m so thankful he knows me so well, knows what I need, knows how I connect with him.
Do You Feel a Lack of Spiritual Connection?
Remember, God knows you perfectly. He will meet you in a way that is right for you. Don’t lose heart: He’s everywhere.
Dear Father,
Thank you for meeting me in the garden. I love you.
Please lift up my friend, my sister, who is reading this today. Encourage her. Restore her faith, her hope, her feeling of connection with you.
In Jesus’ name, Amen.

With love,

I can so relate! I love to feel His Presence and when I don’t, I miss it terribly. You’re right, we wait on His timing to reveal Himself to us again!
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“God brought the worship team to my backyard. His worship team, His way. I’m so thankful he knows me so well, knows what I need, knows how I connect with him.”
This is SO typical of God; I love it. Thanks for linking up at Grace & Truth.
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Thanks Lisa. 🙂
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God’s silences are never without purpose. And when He breaks the silence, our relationship with Him is even more treasured than before. Those are Kay Arthur’s thoughts, though not an exact quote, from her book, His Imprint, My Expression. You experienced treasured moments of intimacy with God, upon discovering His praise team in your backyard, Sara. Praise God he does indeed meet us in ways that are right for each of us!
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Thanks, Nancy. Your words are encouraging, especially as I read them tonight when I’m tired, grouchy, and not feeling spiritual at all. LOL. He’s still here with me. 🙂
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Praise God the words he led me to send your way brought encouragement!
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Beautifully written.
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Thanks 🙂
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Beautifully piece on connection with God! Thank you, Sara!
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Thank you for sharing a very personal and amazing testimony! God is near to all who seek Him! “Who has ascended into heaven and descended? Who has gathered the wind in His fists? Who has wrapped the waters in His garment? Who has established all the ends of the earth? What is His name or His son’s name? Surely you know!” Proverbs 30:4.
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I needed this reminder Sara. I’ve been feeling disconnected myself and you reminded me that lockdown has kept me from my usual nature retreats. Thank you. I know what I need to do!
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Sending love your way, Akairos. 🙂
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We aren’t meant to do faith alone. I’m struggling with my devos for the first time in over 7 years. I have a lack of connection when I “try”. But when I sit and rest, God has been surprising me as well with his presence.
It’s almost as if God is speaking over everyone: “Don’t you get it?!? REST Already!!!”
Reminds me of that verse in Isaiah, “In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength.”
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I got shivers when I read this verse. Uh huh. I have have felt more restless during all this “rest” than I have in years. God is certainly stirring something up.
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It’s Isaiah 30:15… I’ve loved the verse for years. It’s the end that gives me shivers though: “For the Lord God, the Holy One of Israel has said this, ‘In repentance and rest is your salvation, In quietness and trust is your strength.’ But you were not willing…”
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Sara, I completely understand what you described; those desert places where only stillness before Him brings release, a knowing He is with you. Thank you for sharing this special moment. ♥
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I love that you get it. Not everyone does. 🙂
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I am so glad that you found the peace that you were looking for.
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Thank you. 🙂
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